“If I must just choose the method of my demise, I choose…
Death By Cinema!” -Britt Rhuart
Day 30 – Sleazemania III: The Good, the Bad, and the Sleazy
No intro for this one, just finishing up this trailer and clip compilation.
Random Thoughts While Watching the Film:
We start with a series of random clips introducing the title over bizarre chanting. Then some chick dances and we start. One card said it’s “The Hottest Thing You’ve Ever Seen!” Not even close. Another says, “It Will Live In Your Memory Forever!” God, I hope not.
I do like one of the title cards, “If You Are UNDER 18 – You Won’t Understand It… and If You Are PAST 60 – YOU CAN’T STAND IT!” True story.
Here’s a trailer for a movie called Dance Hall Racket. A guy dies with one weak punch. What a puss. It’s very stupid.
We see a striptease clip called Bagdad After Midnite. Funny how the strippers show no sign of ever having been to Bagdad either in dress or appearance.
Here’s a trailer for a movie called I Married a Savage. With a title like that, I hoped for something more. It’s literally a girl dancing with a snake for most of the trailer. It did have a cool soundtrack.
Now a trailer for a film called Escort Girl. It’s exactly what you think it is.
Here’s an old school theatre ad for a Jalopy Night at the theatre, where you could win a car. Why don’t they have that any more?!?
Here’s old school stripper Lili St. Cyr, doing what she does best… or at least moderately well.
Oh, good, it’s the trailer for a movie that literally changed the nation… Child Bride. It’s a God awful piece of exploitation trash, yet important to history as this movie actually helped enact age of consent laws across the country. So, it did a great thing for America, but at what cost to cinema?!?
We move onto a trailer for a film called I Want a Baby. They’re not even trying anymore. Literally, they don’t even show any scenes from the movie, just images.
Keeping with the baby theme, we move onto a trailer for the film Test Tube Babies. It’s one of those films that say women can only be happy if they’re married and have a baby. The best part of the thing is the guy sees his wife in a nightie and says she looks “sharp.” Man, that’s smooth as glass. Also, the woman refuses to adopt a kid. What a self centered person.
Now another striptease, this time Tijuana After Midnite. At least the girls and there costumes look somewhat Hispanic. The trailer also says “Hotter Than Mexican Chili.” Man, the days before Mexican food really became popular outside the southwest.
And… SANTA?!? It’s not even Halloween yet! He wishes us a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
There’s a trailer for Racket Girls. It’s really just women wrestling and mob bosses. Also, some girls wrestle in cat masks.
Here’s a trailer for a film called Woman’s a Fool. They’re not even trying to hide their sexism any more? Or they’re racism as all the women in the film are African-American… except for the ones in blackface. Oh, and transphobic, because there’s a girl and they don’t know if she’s “man or woman.” If she identifies as she, she’s a woman.
Here’s a trailer for a movie where a magician kills people with magic while girls dance around naked… wait, isn’t that The Wizard of Gore? No, this is Many Ways to Sin.
Actual quote from the above trailer: “Some girls have to be forced to give in.” No, they don’t. That’s called rape and it’s terrible.
We see an animated ad for the concession stand, featuring pirates for some stupid reason.
This trailer dares to show… Unmarried Mothers! *gasp of shock* That’s also the title of the film. For some reason it’s silent and feature subtitles. It also says that the children are unwanted. Dude, that’s really not cool to blame the children. I mean, it’s also not cool to blame the moms, but it’s really not cool to blame the kids. Screw you, trailer.
BTW, let me just point out, it’s a bad idea to have white lettered title cards come up in a black and white trailer, as half the message often gets lost in the print.
Here’s a trailer for a film called Babes and Hooligans. Nothing here.
Oh, my God, Color! It’s great to have you back!
Here’s the trailer for Blaze Starr Goes Nudist, yet they call it This Little Girl Had Knockers! It’s sad I know the name of this film without the real title appearing on the screen. It’s a nudie cutie. Just a stripper walking around all nude. Pretty colors.
Here’s a trailer for a film called The Naked and the Wicked. I’m surprised they aren’t saying those are the same thing, slut shaming as this compilation has been so far.
Here’s a trailer from a movie called The Depraved, The Demented, and The Damned. This one actually looks semi-interesting. It reminds we of a Doris Wishman sexploitation film, like a Bad Girls Go To Hell or Another Day, Another Man. It’s actually decently shot, decent music, and a cool looking title card. This might be the only film I’ve seen today that I’d actually watch the whole film.
Next, the trailer for Office Love-In. Surprisingly, it features a transvestite and a gay man. Of course, they’re one and the same, despite the fact that most transvestites are straight… but whatever, facts. It also features a lesbian relationship. Of course, they only show it in an exploitative way.
Now the trailer for a film called Dandy, about the girls of the “free-love generation.” The trailer is horribly edited. The only slightly interesting thing is they show body painting. It’s only interesting because it reminds me of Laugh In.
After a silent ad saying the are more Prevues for Coming Attractions, we see the trailer for Honey. The only thing I can say about the trailer is… at least the song has a smooth bass line and some decent harmonica playing.
We’ve got a trailer for a for a movie called “Don’t Just Lay There.” Arggghhh!!! Is this over yet? 10 more minutes? Son of a bitch! At least the trailer used the phrase “humping orgasmanauts.” That was kinda funny. They also describe a woman as a “non-stop humper.” Okay, there was one more great thing. It’s not rated X… it’s rated “B… for balls.” You know this is actually probably one of the more entertaining trailers of this film, though the narrator seems to be WAY too defensive and chatty about it.
Here’s a trailer for a film called Quicky Motel. The only notable thing is a girl doing naked jumping jacks. It asks the question, “Does a marriage license give license to rape?” No. Nothing does.
Actual quote: “Oh, no. A fag in drag.” Screw you… just as much for putting no emotion behind the line, just as much as that line is offensive.
Oh, good a trailer for a Mondo film… Mondo Psycho. It has some weird ass visual images, with bizarre filters and it messes with the contrast of all the images. Well, here’s the film to watch if I ever drop acid. I honestly can’t tell what’s happening in most shots.
Actual final quote: “If you liked Scum of the Earth… if you liked the Smut Peddler… you’re gonna love Mondo Psycho!” Well, it did pick out two of the less terrible sexploitation films, so I guess I’ll have to see that film at some point.
Finally, it’s over. Look, I love trailer compilations, I have and watch several of them. This one was hard to get through, and I mean all 3 parts. These were, by in large, not fun to watch as most trailers were, they were just painful. The nudity was over the top and unnecessary, but then again, that’s sexploitation. Sexploitation is probably my least favorite type of exploitation film, because so much is unnecessary. If you like it, I won’t kink-shame you, but this just wasn’t for me, especially the last part. The first part actually had its moments, even part two was okay. The third part was just painful.
Tomorrow will be my last review and… it’s a sexploitation? Damn… but it’s at least got some violence, a cool story, and was a big enough draw to spin off 3 sequels. Plus, it features the beautiful Dyanne Thorne. Those aware of exploitation films know I mean… Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS!